On 3/22/2008 at 2:30am I was mugged in my building outside of my apartment door. At first I thought I was fine but soon realized that the event had a greater impact on me then I anticipated.
I wanted to read other's who had the same story but couldn't find anything.
So I created my own place to share my story with you.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Nightmares and calls

When I got off the phone with my mom last night she said, "At least you haven't had any nightmares."
Tonight I had a nightmare.
But not what you'd think.
I was riding on a bus with my mom and we had luggage with us. We were traveling to our house in Fairfax and debating where to be dropped off. Finally I convinced her to go where I thought was closest and we got off. She had he purse on top of her suitcase, open. A skinny brunette girl with square cut bangs and straight hair cam up and started to try and go through my mom's purse. I went over to stop her, saying "hello", waving at her then starting to curse at her and, when she wouldn't stop coming closer, I wanted to hit her. I kept using the word "fuck" and it shocked my mom and embarrassed her that the girl and her mother would hear me use that. She apologized to the strangers and invited them over to the house. They came over and I was still angry and saying "fuck" a lot and my mom kept apologizing for me an trying to hush me up. That just made me angrier because here are these people who are trying to take advantage of her and all she can worry about is my language. And now we are fighting while the strangers are left alone in the living room

I woke up unsettled. I stayed perfectly still as if that would help me figure out what that was all about. A tingly sensation went through my body signaling the transition between sleeping and waking. the whole dream left me unsettled and scared but I don't know why. I turned on the lights in my room and checked my email only to find that there was a message for me left on my answering service. I check it and it's a message from Detective Lopez regarding my "robbery complaint." He left it at 12:09am and it was now 3:49am. I turned on my cell phone and tried the number. It rang and rang with no answer. I hang up and see a text from Shahnee saying the detective called her trying to find me.
Why do they need to talk to me?

I have all these images in my head of going down to the 30th precinct and having to pick the guy from a lineup. He's in there for something else but something about him matches the description I gave. Maybe the jacked up teeth. I think that if I had to pick them out I'd have to make them smile. That smile has stuck with me. Over and over again I see that smile. He smiled when I held the door open, he smiled as he came towards me. I can't get that smile out of my head. It was so simple when it started and now it's mutated into the definition of something disgusting and dirty and deceitful.

So now 2 hours or more later I'm still up. I've finished the latest book I was reading and tried to cal the detective 3 more times. It's probably nothing, maybe just working through paperwork. But why call at midnight? The curiosity is killing me.

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